I had an amazing Caregiver Retreat over the weekend and now I’m home.

I’m home…Mike has a million questions as I try to settle him for bed. “Do I still work? Do I go to school tomorrow? Where do we live? Are the kids ok? Where’s my Dad? Do I have a wallet? Where are my guns? Why does my head hurt? What happened to me? Where is the bathroom? Where is my bed? What’s the date today? Is it summer break? Can I buy a truck? Can I watch the Saints play?”

…He must not remember that I was gone for for the weekend because he hasn’t mentioned it. Things are back to “normal” that quickly.

The thing I miss the most right this moment is laying down in a silent room and going to sleep without having to settle anyone else first. That was glorious. I didn’t have to cut up anyone’s food before I ate. Actually, I got to SIT and eat my meals!! I got to shower only me. Normally I shower 3 others before myself. The weekend was amazing on so many levels. I don’t know that I can even articulate what the weekend did for me. I connected with others that just get me. That was huge. There’s just so much that I can’t even find the words. I got to enjoy just ME for the weekend again. I have so much more to write about my weekend. Another time.

Since being home I’m already pulled in different directions. Mike needs help finding the bathroom, Mike needs medicine, Kenzie wants help, the toddler is doing toddler things, I’m worried about where Kayla is at and what Cameron is doing, laundry, dishes, unpack, get the kids ready for school, need to mop, and on and on.

I will rise and do it a thousand times.

But I need breaks.

If you are interested in giving me a two hour break watching Caralyn and Mike, just let me know! I’m making self care a priority. Mike isn’t comfortable with everyone, but something’s gotta give. I will have a break down if I don’t start caring for myself and putting myself first sometimes.

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