Life has a crazy way of flip flopping things around just as you are finding your way.  At least that’s what happened to me and my family.

I’ve been blogging this as “Mikes wife living through all things Mike” – and I lost a little bit of me.  I had a lot going on before this all started. Because things are calm for a moment with Mike’s brain cancer, I am taking this blog post on more of a “me” standpoint.  I’m a professional photographer.  I’ve only picked up the camera twice in the last month, so this blog post is probably more for me than for you.  Business was as good as I wanted it to be.  I had more clients contacting me than I was able to take on.  I was able to take the time to get to know clients and really put 100% into their sessions. I also had found the right balance of home life and taking care of my children.  It is hard to factor in the editing time, and the editing time was taking over my family time some nights.  My recent niche is newborns.  Newborn sessions are the ones that give me the most “warm and fuzzies” as I’m editing the session. I get such a blessing out of snuggling the little babies that come through here. I can feel just how the parent is going to feel seeing this photos, and that is exciting. One year ago I would have told you that newborns and couples were my weakness.  Well, right now I feel like they are my strength.  My strengths and weaknesses in photography change often because it depends on what is “in season” for me.  I have seasons of studio lighting, seasons of natural lighting, seasons of boudoir, seasons of families, and seasons of newborns.  Right now I am really enjoying newborns and engagements/weddings.

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Does that photo not melt your heart?  It does mine.  Every time.

I’ve said this before, but I will say it again because it tells everything about why I love photography and need it in my life….

“When I am behind the camera, I forget about everything else.  Taking photos is the only time that I am 100% in that moment and have no stress or worries about anything else.”

But….with all that said….

I choose to take a break from business right now.

…..

Here is a little recap for those of you just joining us:

He was diagnosed as a result of an ER visit for headache/confusion on June 14, 2012.

First surgery (with local doctors) to remove the tumor – June 22, 2012

Second surgery (with Dr Allen Friedman at Duke) to implant chemo wafers and start clinical study is scheduled for July 27, 2012

Mike has not been back to work since June 14th and is now on schedule to be finished with the initial radiation and chemo in October. He hopes to work during treatment, but I can’t imagine he will feel well enough. This makes me even more anxious to work my business, but my first priority is my family and taking care of Mike through this.

………

As far as emotions go…it is a roller coaster as I’m sure you can imagine.  One day I feel so positive and full of faith, and then the next I’m a nervous wreck.  I’m sure that’s to be expected in this situation.

………..

The value of friends = priceless.

One friend has started up a fundraising page, one has become a backup babysitter, and we realized which friend makes the absolute BEST desserts, lol.

I’m so proud of the funds that have been raised so far. Check it out at the link below.   I am in fact going to have a hard time spending them when the needs arise because I understand the sacrifice that each person and family made to contribute and I want to be sure that I use the funds responsibly. 🙂

You will have to copy and paste the following link into your browser to go to the page.  I’m not able to get the clickable link to work.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=5559&url=theemmonsfamilymedicalexpensefundraiser

………….

Some days I think “if I could only escape behind the lens for a couple of hours.”

There is one specific shot that I’ve been wanting to set up for about a year. The shot entails a couple in the rain.  I did an engagement session on Friday evening and lo and behold…we got caught in the rain!  YES!!  The specific shot I wanted to do would have needed more planning, but for a spontaneous attempt at the shot, this is pretty close.

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If you are still reading, thank you for taking a little peak into my passion.  I’m choosing to put Mike and the family first right now and I”m happy to do it…but the photography bug is still there daily and I love the small chances to use photography to bless people.


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